


On the Seventh Day of Christmas, Azazel Gave To Me (seven fucking demons)

by Wolfstar4evr



Series: Twelve Days Of Supernatural Christmas [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Demons, Drabble, Lucifer is free, Upset Dean, Upset Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-08 05:56:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5486177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfstar4evr/pseuds/Wolfstar4evr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>20th of December 2009, and Dean finds himself thinking of what Sam set free.</p>
            </blockquote>





	On the Seventh Day of Christmas, Azazel Gave To Me (seven fucking demons)

Sam keeps apologising, well he _kept_ apologising, but it's been a few months now. However Dean can see it in his eyes, that awful, perpetual _sorry_ that's just constantly clouding the puppy eyes and makes Dean want to _stab_ something.

Yeah, sure, he was angry at first. Betrayed, even, but then he realised how he shouldn't be holding on to emotions like that. Sam needed him ( _needs_ him), and anyway, there's no way the kid could have known that killing Lilith would set Lucifer free. Sam thought he was doing it for _Dean_ , as revenge for Dean's trip down to Hell. Ruby manipulated him, got him addicted to demon blood, played off Dean's death and had him right where she wanted him, and Sam had no idea. Dean can't fault him for that.

Now, it's Christmas (well, almost), and Dean hates the rift he can still feel between them. He remembers last year, when was so desperate to celebrate, thinking it was the last time. Now he's back, and Sam is about as far away as he could get while sleeping in the next bed. Guilt is literally _eating_ at his brother, and Dean worries what Sam might do. He has his suspicions that Sam has already tried to kill himself once, when he found out he was Lucifer's vessel, so he doesn't worry too much about Sam ending his life (well he does, because he never wants Sammy to feel like that's necessary, however he knows that Sam wouldn't actually die and he'd have a chance to convince him of that).

Part of him wants to celebrate the holidays, but another part tells him that wouldn't be good. It would cause Sam pain, and that would in turn cause Dean pain, but he doesn't know another way to show his little brother how much he cares, other than to indulge in the way-too-sweet Christmassy crap that Sam should love but never really did.

(and all of that might just be John Winchester's fault, but he'd never say that either)


End file.
